Toxic Masculinity? Healing Femininity? What A Bunch Of Crap!
Considering that the majority of our audience consists of males age 18-32, we are going to start sharing a lot more guy advice videos. It's a popular time for guys to be crapped on in today's society. Guys are often scolded, shamed and told to behave differently with very little actual guidance being offered. In some cases, maybe the guy does need to behave differently. However, there are plenty of cases where women who don't know how to communicate openly offer very little in terms of helping guys understand the opposite gender.
"If you beat a dog to its knees its entire life, it will never stand up" - Isaac Butterfield
The term "toxic masculinity" is a popular term to throw around these days. I find this term to be incredibly problematic. Not the term itself, toxic masculinity is indeed a thing. But toxicity is not a trait exclusive to one gender, as some foolish humans may attempt to force you to believe. In fact, one could easily argue that "toxic femininity" is a very big problem in today's modern world of gender bias, and false accusations.
I once heard an unlicensed counselor attempting to explain to a poor misguided student about "toxic masculinity" and "healing femininity." Now, I want to make it absolutely clear that I have no problem with these two terms themselves. Some men are indeed toxic in the way they behave. Some women are indeed healers. However, these terms are not mutually exclusive to one another. One can be a "Masculine Healer" as well as one can be a "Toxic Feminist."
What I have a huge problem with is when people try to convince others that "Healing Masculinity" or "Toxic Femininity" do not exist. This is a highly problematic perspective that attempts to sweep the asshole-ish behavior of females under a rug and pretend like the pile of stinky garbage doesn't exist. To be quite clear, there are a lot of female assholes out there. Just do a quick search for "Big Red" on YouTube, for example.
To put it simply guys, sometimes you are indeed in the wrong and need to
adjust your methods. However, sometimes all you did wrong was approach
the wrong woman. If she is not interested, she is not interested and you
should indeed stop pursuing her. "No" absolutely means "no." Particularly in situations where the woman is actually able to string the two letters "n" and "o" together, rather than beating around the bush with mixed signals. But don't let any woman tell you how
to behave towards "everyone" just because she personally doesn't like you. In some cases all you did
wrong was that you simply weren't her type. You may do absolutely nothing
wrong with your approach, but if she doesn't like you she may react as
if you're Satan himself trying to shove a finger in her butt-hole.
Well fellas, I'm telling you this right now, never let one person speak for everyone. Nobody speaks for "everyone" because everyone is different. I've seen women scream at men on social media telling them things like "never ask a lady to..." or "never say... to a woman." Approach a different woman with the same method and she may smile and be receptive to it. Everyone is different. Never ever ever let one person attempt to speak for "everyone." Attempting to speak for everyone only highlights their own ignorance and shortsightedness.
Some women enjoy being treated like a lady. Some women enjoy a little dirty talk. Some women will enjoy the manly way that you pursue them, but not all of them will. When you find a woman who doesn't like you and she tries to shame you into feeling bad for the way you approached her, don't take it personally. She's just not a match, you're not a terrible person. Thank her for not wasting your time (to yourself mentally, not out loud verbally). Move on and find someone who is on the same page as you.
let those spoiled, immature types with zero communication skills get you down.
Leave those types of ladies be. They have a long life of herding cats ahead of them.